genesis domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /services/webpages/f/i/financialpsychologycenter.com/public/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6114Journalist\u2019s name: Laura McMullen<\/p>\n
Publication: Nerdwallet<\/p>\n<\/div>\n
Breaking up sucks \u2014 even if it\u2019s necessary and you\u2019re better off without them. Emotions loom large and life changes. Your to-do list fills up with loaded logistics, like figuring out who gets the cat or how the heck you\u2019ll afford to live alone.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n We don\u2019t know what to tell you about the cat, but we can speak to the <\/span>financial aspect<\/span><\/a>. After all, splitting can get sticky if you and your partner share money in some way or rely on each other financially.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n If you\u2019re married, learn <\/span>how to prepare your money for divorce<\/span><\/a>. If you\u2019re not married, here\u2019s guidance for detangling your finances.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n Breakups are often emotional. Those feelings can influence behaviors and decisions, says Alex Melkumian, a licensed marriage and family therapist and founder of the Financial Psychology Center in Los Angeles.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n For example, if you\u2019re furious at your partner, you may do whatever it takes to quickly leave the relationship. That may mean conceding the cat and rent-controlled apartment. Or if you\u2019re worried you\u2019ll be financially insecure on your own, you may stay in an unhappy relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n A note about that kind of dynamic: When a partner uses money for power and control, they\u2019re entering financial abuse territory. Forms of financial abuse, \u201cinclude tactics to conceal information, limit the victim\u2019s access to assets or reduce accessibility to the family finances,\u201d according to the National Network to End Domestic Violence. <\/span>Learn more on the NNEDV website<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n If you\u2019re not experiencing financial abuse but feel that emotions are clouding your judgment, first acknowledge your inner critic. That voice \u201ccan be really discouraging, judgmental and shameful,\u201d Melkumian says.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n Perhaps your inner critic berates you for choosing the wrong person or for buying a car with them, for example.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n Your inner critic also \u201cover-exaggerates the importance of every small decision,\u201d he adds. The voice may insist that if you don\u2019t get something just right, your life will be ruined.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n Melkumian has some of his clients speak these critiques aloud. Try it, and ideally you\u2019ll hear how mean and unfair that voice is. Or, he suggests asking: \u201cWould you let someone else talk to you or a friend like that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n Also, beware of sacrificing too much in this breakup in an effort to \u201ckeep the peace,\u201d says Kaylin Dillon, a Lawrence, Kansas-based certified financial planner focused on couples and families.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n \u201cYour future self is counting on you to think about your best interest,\u201d she says.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\nAcknowledge emotions<\/span><\/h2>\n<\/div>\n
Manage those feelings<\/span><\/h2>\n<\/div>\n